Life As A Mew
by Kish's Kittie
Summary: Basically a big parody of Tokyo Mew Mew. It makes fun of the characters, and brings out their inner most thoughts. It's basically just stupid, true, ironic, humor. Enjoy! Oneshot.


You might think that the characters are a little OOC. But, I don't think so because one: It's a parody they're supposed to be that way, and two: the character's personalities are based on what they are thinking in the manga and anime. Enjoy!!!

**_Life As A Mew_**

**By: Kish's Kittie**

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"I swear! I'm going to quit! Nyan!" Ichigo threw down her rag after wiping a table clean, "I'm sick of having to clean up people's crap! Nya!" 

"Then quit." Ryou said.

"Fine! Nya!" Ichigo picked up her rag and threw it down again. Ichigo took off her apron and headed for the door.

"Don't quit Ichigo-san!" Lettuce said, "We love you!"

"Na no da! Na no da!" Pudding, apparently agreed.

"I would turn around and say the same thing, but I have to uphold my supermodel attitude and act cool, plus my left side is bad. People have to photograph my right…" Zakuro crossed her arms.

"Yeah, same here. I'm too busy sitting on my butt, drinking tea, and admiring super cool Onee-sama." Mint sipped her tea.

"Whatever… Nya…" Ichigo walked out of the door and shut it behind her. As soon as she looked up she saw brown eyes.

"Wh- What? It's Hottie er, Aoyama-kun! Nya!" Ichigo squealed.

"Hey Momomiya-san. I was just going to borrow some trash bags so I could go around and pick up the trash around here. Save the trees!" Masaya held up a peace sign in the air.

"Oh yeah! I'll do it too! I love picking up other people's crap! Nya!" Ichigo smiled.

--

"Zakuro?" Ryou said.

"Yeah." Zakuro flipped her hair and walked over to him with her hands on her hips, not turning to her left side.

"I never had the guts to tell you this, but… man! You're hot!" Ryou smirked.

"I know… but Mint kind of beat you to that…" Zakuro sighed. They turn to Mint who's holding up a sign that says, "I LOVE YOU!!!"

"Shirogane-san! You can't! I love you!" Lettuce ran up to Ryou, blushing and begging on her knees.

"Pft… Why?" Ryou put his hands in his pockets.

"Because, I'm overwhelmed by your sexiness!" Lettuce stood up and kissed Ryou.** Muah!**

"Sorry, Broccoli I- I mean, Lettuce. I'm too sexy for both you and Zakuro. I have to go find Ichigo so I can admit my undying, sexy love for her." He said and walked out of the café doors.

"So who wants cake?" Keiichirou walked out of the kitchen smiling.

"Na no da!!! Na no da!" Pudding yelled.

"No. I'm full from tea." Mint shrugged…

"Sorry, but if I did I'd just throw it up anyway…" Zakuro said. Lettuce was too busy crying to answer…

--

"Look! It's an empty can! Nya!" Ichigo picked it up and put it in the trash bag Masaya was holding, which reminds me, how did he get that?

"It's great how we're saving the world together. It just brings me closer to my goal…" Masaya smiled.

"What's that? Nya?" Ichigo asked.

"Being… Superman!" He posed. An anime sweat drop ran down the back of Ichigo's head.

"Ichigo…" Ichigo heard someone call her name. It wasn't Masaya, because the voice was too sexy… Ichigo turned around and saw Ryou standing there in the distance. His blond hair blew brightly in the wind.

"Hey, it's that guy that's always giving me dirty looks!" Masaya pointed at Ryou. Ryou walked up to Ichigo and just stood there with his hands in his pockets. The wind blew by and some leaves passed.

"Ichigo."

"Yes… Shirogane. Nya."

"I… am not your father. I love you." Ryou stated.

"Well! Finally! It's about time! Nya!" Ichigo yelled, "I knew that's why you stared at me all the time as well as kissed me that one time! Nya!"

"What?" Masaya asked.

"Oh it was nothing, and I love you remember. Nya." Ichigo smirked.

"Oh yeah." Masaya scratched his head.

"Ichigo. You have to love me! I'm sexy!" Ryou kissed Ichigo. Ichigo pushed him away.

"Sorry, but I still love Masayo, I mean Masaya. I am Loyal to him. Nya." Ichigo put her hands on her hips.

"Hello, Kitten." Ichigo turned to see Kish floating in the air.

"Quiche! I mean, Kish! What the heck? What the heck? Why do you always show up at the worst times? Nya!" Ichigo yelled.

"Because… I'm the villain. It's what I do." Kish put his hands on his hips, "Anyways… Muahaha! You'll soon be mine Ichigo!" Ryou jumped in front of Ichigo.

"No! I love her!" Ryou yelled. Masaya jumped in front of Ryou.

"Ichigo loves me!" Masaya shouted.

"Get, get out of my way!" Kish flew down and smacked Masaya to the ground, "Puny human." He landed on the grass, under a tree, by a rock. Masaya's eyes widened.

"Oh no! Kryptonite!" Masaya flinched, "Now I can't save Ichigo!"

"Ichigo!" Ichigo heard voices in unison. The other mews and Keiichirou headed over to them.

"What are you guys doing here? How'd you know I was in trouble, nya?"

"We're heroes," Mint replied, "It's what we do."

"Yeah." Lettuce nodded.

"Yeah…" Zakuro flipped her hair, still turned to her right side.

"Na no da!" Pudding yelled.

"Fruity… Ice Breaker… Echo!"

"Fruity… Pomegranate… Pure!"

"Fruity… Na no da!"

"Fruity… Green Rush!" All the mew's attacks went heading for Kish. He, without breaking a sweat, dodged them.

"Dragon swords!" Kish summoned his weapons and… **BAM! POW! WHAM! BOOM!**

"Ow…"

"Itai…"

"Na no da…" All of the mews were down. The only people standing were Ichigo, Ryou, and Keiichirou, and if you count floating, Kish.

"Now what, kitten?" Kish put his hands on his hips.

"This!" Ichigo held up her pendant in the air, "PINK RAINBOWY… METAMORPHOSIS!!!"

Ichigo landed on the ground, newly transformed.

"Strawberry Destroyer! Nya!" Ichigo summoned her weapon, "Fruity… Pink… Surprise!!! Nya!!!" Her attack missed Kish directly.

"Man, koneko… you're hot, but your aim sucks… Oh well, bye bye!" Kish teleported away…

Ryou let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh what the heck! Nya!" Ichigo kissed Ryou passionately. **MUAH!**

**_OWARI_**

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**For all comments, threats, flames, compliments, and laughs, please review!**

**This was really something different than what I usually write, but I was bored and I thought it would be funny to write a parody, because I'm always making fun of the characters... :-P**


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